Healing Your Heart After Abortion
This week’s guest is Connie-Anne Holman. She’s an Intuitive Mindset Coach and Therapist, who specializes in helping people evolve into higher, better versions of themselves. Our conversation today is all about the healing of the heart.
Learn more about her at her website: https://www.connieanneholman.com/
or on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/connieanneholmancoaching
In every episode I read a blog post I’ve written and we follow up with a conversation about the topic at hand and what it means for women and their ability to thrive after abortion. Happy listening and as always feel free to send me your reflections and questions at the PodBlog page on my website.
The post:
I’m not sure when it happened, a slow evolution of the human species, but somewhere along the way we human beings started leading with our minds instead of our hearts. We started listening to logic over love, intellect over intuition, and our thoughts over our feelings. This way of being has led us into an incredible growth as a species; just look down at the phone in your hand, or up to the roof over your head to see where the brilliance of the human mind has brought us. But, these minds of ours have also pulled us away. They’ve pulled us away from the accurate and attuned guidance that our hearts provide.
So many of the women I connect with in my abortion work are healing from what they identify as broken hearts. Their abortions were a necessary step along their path, but have also left them with feelings of grief and heartache. Left unresolved, these feelings are complicating their lives, so they come to me, or seek support from others, to heal their “broken hearts.”
I remind them:
You are whole and complete
The discomfort you feel does not mean anything has gone wrong
You are not wrongChoose kindness, compassion, forgiveness… choose love for yourself and for the pregnancy you chose not to bring to full term
Find connection: with me, with your community, with the soul of your unborn baby
Remember that being human is a 50/50 experience- it’s not all supposed to feel good. Humans are meant to feel a full spectrum of emotions, and abortion is an opportunity to allow yourself to feel deeply and powerfully
What I don’t remind them all, because they are not all ready for it, is that hearts don’t break. Put your hand on your chest. Feel the rhythm, feel the beat, and you’ll hear wisdom from your heart that your mind could never give you. Your heart is a never ending source of intuitive guidance and it never leads you astray. When we feel the discomfort of a “broken heart”, what we’re really feeling is a message. In what feels like darkness resides love, and it’s always ready to guide you forward.
Many of us have been socially stumped to forget that we are intuitive beings with heart centered guides. We are too busy thinking to listen to the wisest teacher we have, the one nestled into our own chests. We have to make room in our lives to be able to hear the teachings of our heart, and there any many ways to do so.
My top 5 favorite tools for reconnecting with your intuitive knowing, and healing the “broken heart” are:
Writing!
Nature
Meditation
Feng Shui
Surrender
And here’s 5 challenges to get you started on tapping into your intuition for healing after abortion:
Writing-Grab a pen and paper and write at the top of the page- “What is my heart trying to tell me?” Then let the answers flow through your hand. You’ll be shocked at the wisdom that comes through, and the more you practice this inner listening the clearer the messages get.
Nature-The next time you can get you lungs to some fresh air, or better yet your bare feet to the earth, look for signs. See all the ways that nature “breaks” and rebuilds, notice all the places she rises strong and beautiful. Then remind yourself that you are an extension of her.
Mediation-Find and or create at least 3 quiet minutes to slow your brain down. Settle your body into a comfortable position and imagine yourself giving your brain and your heart a good sweeping and dusting. Clear out all the thoughts that fill your mind, and sit with the empty space long enough to feel yourself lighten. Then ask your brain and your heart to start communicating again, remind them that they have each other and that you need them both to help you heal. Then take a deep breath and trust them both to guide you as you move back into your daily life.
Feng Shui- The next time you walk into your bedroom, locate the corner to the far right of the room. This is the Love & Relationship corner of the Feng Shui Bagua map. Give that corner a good decluttering and or dusting, and light a candle or place something special there to draw attention to the relationship you have with yourself and anyone involved in your abortion. Ask for forgiveness and decide to move forward in love.
Surrender- This is one of the hardest and most important tools we have for bringing love back into our hearts. To surrender after abortion is to trust that whether it all makes sense to you or not, your abortion was meant to be. Surrender is to believe that this is true, simply because it happened. Let go of your attachment to answers and shift your attention to curiosity and trust. Asking questions like “How did this abortion happen for me?” or “How did this make me stronger?” will guide you toward the life you are meant to have. Release you attachment to what it all means and let your heart show you what more is possible.
